In my last post, I unpacked some thoughts and feelings about the election.
It is a little darker than most of my blogs but it was really hard to “bright side” some of the things I’ve seen and heard over the last few months.
I guess most of us are attempting to move on from all of it, but it is important to unpack some of this before we move on.
I hope that by doing that, we will not only have more civil discourse before an election, but we will also make an effort to discuss our differences without demonizing the other side. That, in turn, could lead to understanding even if we don’t agree on the issues.
It is important that we don’t agree on all of the issues but that we do it with kindness and at least, civility. I believe kindness is superior to civility because civility feels like tolerating but not acting on your hostility toward them. Kindness should include empathy and understanding, even if you never change your view.
As a review, I want to make it clear that the audience I am addressing is the Church. Those of us who have made a commitment to be salt and light in this world.
It would seem that, at times, we have traded salt and light for vinegar and vitriol. In other words, we have opted to engage in culture wars in lieu of being a steady presence of faith, hope, and love. (1 Cor 13:13)
I know, the temptation will be to read this article and forward it to someone who “really needs it” but I assure you that “someone” is us.
In other words…
This is not for other people, this is for you and for me.
Since last week, I heard from many of you that you personally were maligned or misunderstood regarding how you voted. This in turn led to speculation about what kind of person you were and how morally bankrupt you’ve become. My guess is, you had your reasons for voting the way you did and none of it came from a bad place.
Let me just say I’m sorry that you went through that and were on the receiving end of someone else’s aggression and anger. I hope you find rest and healing.
This may sound weird, but I want you to bookmark those feelings. Hear me out, I’m not asking you to hold a grudge. Please forgive the people involved even if they aren’t asking for it. God wants you to do that for Him and for you.
“And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” Ephesians 4:32
What I do want you to do, is to remember how it feels to have someone assign false motivations to you. For someone, out of fear, to categorize you as the enemy and draw a cartoon version of your thoughts and feelings on a particular issue.
It hurts when someone assumes the worst of you when they don’t even know you.
I want you to remember that because it will help you steer clear of doing the same to someone else in the future. Let’s be honest, we all do it. Many of us spend a lot of time researching articles and clicking on links that support our arguments without spending any time with people who hold an opposing view.
I believe that empathy is the first step in the process for all of us. When we use divisive and hurtful language consistently toward groups of people who hold different beliefs, we slowly but surely dehumanize them. We begin to see them as faceless masses who believe the same things.
Human beings are WAY too different from one another to do that! We can’t agree on pizza toppings, much less how to fix this broken world we live in! I mean, who wants anchovies on pizza anyway?!! If that’s you, let’s sit down, not over pizza, and discuss. I’d love to know your reasons. 🙂
Our fingerprints, talents, goals, preferences, experiences, childhoods, neighborhoods, grandparenthoods, and all of the other “hoods” are too unique for us to lump people together like that.
Our culture is lacking nuance and critical thinking.
This is what fear does to us. In the words of Frank Herbert, author of the Dune series, “Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.”
My guess is, you agree with that on some level. However, the closer we get to an election or political event, our airwaves, and it seems like the air we breathe, are all flooded with fear. You can present truth without accusation and facts without telling someone how to feel about them. That is not what news outlets and political pundits do. Because even though “fear is the mind-killer” is also a powerful motivator.
John Lennon once said, “There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love.” I believe that’s true. Those aren’t the only motivating factors but they are the most prevalent and the most powerful in my experience.
John (not Lennon) writes that “perfect love casts out fear.” (1 John 4:18). So if we are motivated by love instead of fear, we make better decisions, we do what is in the best interest of the parties involved.
I know, the “other side” is the one motivated by fear right? I want you to carefully evaluate whether or not that is true. Is the news network, the online sources you read and watch, do they also motivate through fear? Some of us may say “No, my news tells me the truth and the truth is scary.” I get that, and it isn’t totally wrong. I would encourage you to take careful inventory of the words your news sources are using and the way things are framed to determine whether that statement is completely accurate.
So how do we move forward from here? My first recommendation is that we apply the same rules to our lives post election than we do pre election.
If we are going to do that, we all have some soul-searching to do.
Many years ago I heard someone say “It is what it is…but it’s not what it should be.” I love that! The idiom, “It is what it is” has always bothered me. It feels chocked full of apathy and snark. It is a way of giving up and not putting forth any effort to pave a better road forward or create a bridge from “this sucks” to “my future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades.” (Props to Timbuk 3)
Here are a few things that I am considering. (Apologies for the length of the post.)
1) Engage in civil discourse not civil war.
We should all engage in the political process, driven by our faith, assuming that other people have good reasons to vote the way they do. Let’s talk about those reasons without attacking that person or their beliefs. They are not stupid, nor are they ignorant of the facts. Most people, not all, have arrived at their opinion by wrestling through the issues and using their values.
Social media is NOT the best way to do that. If you believe passionately what you believe, you should be able to kindly and without accusation discuss this with someone face to face or over the phone, via text or private messages. You can passionately believe what you believe and allow them to be passionate about what they believe.
It helps if you actually listen to the reasons of the opposing side while peacefully and without accusation presenting what you believe. Try sitting down with someone and really hearing what they have to say and not preparing your next rebuttal.
If you can only have a discussion where you are demolishing the other person’s point of view, without listening to what they truly believe, you are not having a discussion, it is an attack.
Also, disagreement is not the same as hating them. We have lost this nuance in our world. If you are kind in how you disagree, acknowledging that someone’s point of view is valid, you can disagree without animosity. However, don’t passive-aggressively take verbal jabs at someone and pass it off as civility. Just because you aren’t ugly in the way you attack someone, doesn’t make you kind.
Love someone enough to truly hear them.
2) There is only us.
During the four years I was Lead Pastor of my church, I had to have said the following line at least a dozen times.
“There is no us vs them. There is only us.”
At the end of the day, God created us all and we are His children. Sure, we don’t all believe the same things but God loves us equally. There are many things that I can “agree to disagree” on but this isn’t one of them. We must come to a place where we view people as people and not issues. When we view people through the lens of an issue, it is easy to dehumanize them and then come up with policies and laws that are somewhat cold and destructive because we don’t have to deal with the hurt that comes from them. If we are not personally effected by harsh laws and policies, it is disingenuous and cold, to tell someone they are acting irrationally or emotionally. You have the luxury of not being affected by it so you are not emotional. Be honest about that.
When we view people as people, we then have to spend time with them to figure out their point of view and why the issues they champion are important to them, you might learn something about “the other side” that you hadn’t intended.
Also, when we view the world through the lens of “sides” we automatically become tribal and combative. This serves the political system and does damage to the community of The Way. When the election is over, the politicians get what they want but “we the people” are the ones that have to live with the lasting damage in our relationships from the events that preceded the election.
I know we don’t all want the same things. That is okay. It is okay to “agree to disagree” on issues. If we all agreed, there wouldn’t be tension and without the tension, bad decisions are made. We need to disagree civilly, but at the same time remember that we are all human beings made in the image of God.
Every last one of us. (Gen 1:27)
3) Reasons not rhetoric.
You can give reasons for why you are voting a specific way without using rhetoric that maligns, assumes, or intentionally mischaracterizes someone. Words like “Nazi” or “woke” are sometimes used to shut people up. I grow weary of hearing both of those. I don’t like how the word “woke” has been used as a pejorative but that horse is out of the barn. The black community used that word to indicate that they would need to be aware of some of the abuse they were enduring but now it is used in mockery. I think that is harmful and hurtful to the community it used to represent.
The word Nazi often cheapens the horrific treatment of the Jewish people during Hitler’s murderous reign and I’m not a fan of that either. The extent and the damage that was caused to the Jewish people is incalculable.
If you cannot spell out what you mean “using your words” (as I would tell my kids when they were younger), don’t resort to attacks meant to demolish your enemy. This does not bring us closer to understanding. It does not accomplish the goal of unity. It is also the sign of someone with a weaker argument who has not thought through their beliefs.
It is possible for us to disagree on policies and candidates, to even have heated debates about them, without devolving into third grade tactics. The way we do this is by sticking to what candidates are saying and what they are doing. Both are important.
As Jesus followers we are encouraged to use our words to build people up and not tear them down. (Eph 4:29)
I have found that if I lead with my curiosity instead of my carefully planned defense or attack, I am more generous with my words. If I really am curious, not passive aggressively “curious”, I will get there.
4) Don’t confuse faith with politics.
Trust me when I say, political strategists are constantly thinking of how they can “use” the Christian vote. Strategists are also thinking of how they can weaponize that vote to decimate the other “side”.
Some of us might be thinking “Good! They need to consider what is important to us to get our vote!” Here’s the problem, they know the keywords to use and they know which factions of Christians to speak to. Both sides do this. Whether that includes the rights of the unborn, helping the poor, prayer, equal rights for everyone, the Bible, helping families, or being compassionate and fair to immigrants.
When we infuse our brand of politics with our faith, when we decide who or what we are going to vote for and then go in search of passages to justify it, we are confusing ourselves and the people around us.
When we infuse our faith into our brand of politics, we are creating a cult out of a party. That creates a paradigm where “our side” is infallible and cannot be questioned because “God is on our side”.
Both of the above scenarios are dangerous. Both cheapen the importance of faith and does damage to cause of Christ.
All we have to do is look at the statistics for how many people are leaving church and look at the reasons for why they are doing it. People are exhausted from the mental gymnastics they have to do to match the words of Jesus with what they hear from the pulpit regarding these issues.
If you are a pastor, you need to take this to heart and seriously wrestle with the Holy Spirit on this issue. I understand the pressure you are under but it is vital to the impact that Jesus can have on a person’s life, that you not cave under that pressure.
The more we confuse our faith with our politics, the less transformation we will see in our churches, the less diversity we will see in our congregations, and the more exits we will experience from long standing members in our faith communities.
5) Remember the election is only the beginning.
An election isn’t rubber-stamping every decision someone makes. Let’s be clear, it does make it easier for that individual to make changes that he or she wants, but it doesn’t mean turning a blind eye to them.
I know that I am guilty of this. There have been times when the person I voted for got into office and then I checked out for the rest of their presidency.
We can no longer do this!
We must pay careful attention to the people we give power over us. That is why a person’s character is so vitally important. It drives the daily decisions that he or she makes. I understand that “platforms” and “policies” are vital to any system of politics but a person’s character will determine whether or not they uphold those policies and platforms.
We have to look at the fruit of the actions of people we put into power, not just what they promise us.
We must steer clear of this idea that the end justifies the means.
Jesus made it clear that the end is achieved by the means.
The number of times He addressed our motivations for doing what we do, is unreal. Check out the entirety of Matthew 5 for a sample of this, even though it is peppered throughout the Gospels. The end is achieved by the means. The manner in which we achieve something matters and is a part of the end result. If we adopt a “scorched earth” mentality to getting our person in office, we will need to keep burning things down to get the same result, leaving damage and hurt in our wake.
Please don’t counter this by saying, “God sometimes dismantles evil first to build a new future for us.” I understand the concept but I feel it is misplaced. Jesus never employed cruelty as a means by which to achieve His kingdom. Even flipping the tables in the courtyard was an act of compassion for the people who were being cheated and maligned by the process.
In addition to that, both sides need to consider how much faith we put in a person and a philosophy of politics. We need to guard our hearts and our faith by not allowing things that Jesus never said, to become a central issue for us. (Prov 4:23; Phil 4:7)
One more thing regarding this section. I believe that peaceful protests, political activism on specific issues, and local political involvement are as American as our voting process. I know of pastors who have been arrested because they chose to protest (peacefully) the treatment of individuals they love and would not tolerate verbal or physical abuse of them any longer. I have had conversations with people who were going to attend an event or a parade that highlighted issues that were important to them. There are so many tools at our disposal to be salt and light in different ways. When we allow our love for a people group or for people we know to direct our steps, it is a powerful thing! (Colossians 3:12-14).
When we let love lead, we see God’s power at work.
Love is powerful and peaceful.
I want to end this post by saying this.
The Way of Jesus thrives as an underground movement.
It blossoms amidst suffering. Many times it has been corrupted, used, abused, and confused. When faithful followers of His choose to love God and their neighbor relentlessly by trusting Jesus, the powers that be cannot stop it. (Matt 16:18)
We bear his image and carry His power within us. Our responsibility is always the same regardless of who is in office. Take up your cross and follow Him. Deny self and serve others compassionately.
No person or political figure will be our Messiah. That job has been filled.
We cannot allow any political party to use our faith to ensure our votes.
When we do that, we also let fear and anger motivate us to action. “Perfect love casts out fear.” I know, if you are like me, you can’t love perfectly. That’s why Jesus is so vital to our lives.
If the people who say they follow Jesus do not follow in HIs footsteps of love, they are not following Jesus.
If we carefully examine the life of Jesus, we will imitate His love. If we imitate His love, the political process will be put in its proper place. That place fits within our duty as a citizen of this world. That place is the back seat. Our faith is our guidance system and the Spirit will lead us toward real change in our lives and our communities.
Take care of the ones you love and take care of yourself.
“May the Lord bless you and protect you; may the Lord make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you; may the Lord look with favor on you and give you peace.”’ Numbers 6:24-26
mlsnellings 